When I found I couldn’t peel an orange or a grapefruit anymore (I like my grapefruits eaten in sections like oranges) I started working on how to cut them into sections so they could be tackled with only one working hand. That was not so easy–it was pretty messy and wasted a lot of juice on the counter–and took a cleaver and an acceptance of some pretty weird-shaped slices. After a month or two of this I saw someone at our QIVC retreat peeling an orange so I asked if she could also peel me one. Which she did. And I ate it in sections instead of tearing pulpy pieces off slices of peel–and (heres why the blog post) it was so much more delicious and enjoyable! I had forgotten. I had settled for the self-sufficient DIY method that brought me noticeably less pleasure.
I assume no one out there in healthy-person-land, world of the well, wants to peel my orange for me. But I think this is wrong in general. People wish they could help, change things, make a difference–and this is one thing they can do for me, I guess.
People LOVE to help. It feels good to help someone. You are literally doing the other person a favor by asking them to help you.
So here’s a way to think about it. Remember when your kids were babies? You had to do just about everything for them. Did that make you resentful? Or angry? I didn’t think so. It just made you love them more. And that’s how it feels to help someone who needs your help. We just love you more. xoxoxo Deb
Yes, yes, yes! We all feel so helpless. We would peel cancer cells themselves for you, rip them up with our bare hands, if we possibly could.
Being able to help with small things makes people feel a little less helpless in the face of the really big stuff: like peeling grapefruits vs. killing cancer cells. I guess that’s why I like to send you books when I can–because I can do that, at least. People WANT to help, just as you want to help yourself. So ask and ask, and accept all the help you can get. It really is okay.
and we love spending time with you….
Reading the comments above and thinking — it brings joy and comfort to people to be able to help, AND it brings you more joy from the grapefruit. win, win! Wish I was able to just drop in and peel a grapefruit (I’d eat some too, you know )